Dead Man Walking

I can remember a time in life when I thought I could numb myself to the pains of this world. I have a strong hermit gene that I constantly have to fight against. I prefer to stay at home over anything else. Being in my safe four walls where I command the comings and goings was definitely my first preference. Clubs, bars, even small sporting events in this area didn't excite me. My financial issues made me just want to focus on going to work, paying bills, sleep, and repeat. I saw no true joy in life, just a mediocre existence of repetition. Work, pay bills, sleep, repeat... with being drawn into other people's issues helping to break up the monotony just a little. The sad part was I was willing to live with that existence. Emphasis on "existence" because I was not really living.

Honestly I was just a "dead man walking". People around me couldn't tell it. I functioned at work, gave my best efforts, and kept it moving. I functioned at home, paid bills, help to take care of my mother, and kept it moving. Around family I gathered, conversed, enjoyed that time, and kept it moving. Yet, inside I was stagnate, emotionally unmoved, and uninspired. So how did I get out of that death trap?

Here are a few things I learned to do that took me from merely existing to be determined to enjoy my life.

Are You Willing to Pay the Cost?

One of the shows I love watching on HGTV is "The Property Brothers". On this show twin brothers, Drew and Jonathan Scott, try to help future homeowners find the home of their dreams. They first find a home that has everything the buyer wants on their list. They take the buyers to the property, walk them around it , and "wows" them. Everything they want is wrappped up in one pretty little or big package. Then the brothers hit them with the bottom line, the cost. This is where the buyers get the gut check, and all of them, after hearing the price, look as though they were sucker punched, blindsided, hoodwinked... you get my drift. Then the brothers go on to explain that they can help the buyers get exactly what they want if they look at taking another approach to getting it. Next, the two brothers do their thing in finding properties that can be restored and turned into their buyer's dream home. At the end of the show you have happy buyers thanking the brothers for a job well done and a home that exceeded their expectations. Isn't that just like life?

Go For The Gold

I am very proud of all of our Olympic athletes who are representing the United States of America in London. Their years of discipline, commitment, and dedication to their sporting events are inspiring! It's also amazing to see the excitement that builds for the Olympics and championship games in various sports. We position ourselves in front of the television for hours, if we aren't lucky enough to be front and center at the event, and coach our teams or chosen individuals to greatness. We feel the intensity of that moment right there on the sofa or in our favorite chair! We share the beaming sense of pride in their victory and are quick to rationalize what their shortcomings were if they were defeated. It is so easy to be a Monday morning quarterback, to look from the outside and criticize critique others.

 

Run For Life

I'm going to take a minute and list a few things we run from in life:

1. dogs
2. responsibilities
3. danger
4. people who are chasing you
5. people you don't want to see
6. LIFE

Wait a minute, how do you run from life? Honestly, I ran from life by preoccupying myself with meaningless things that took my mind off my issues and made me too tired to worry about anyone else. Don't get me wrong, if I could do anything to help, I did. I organized various school projects from food drives to supplies for soldiers overseas. I wanted to instill in my students the importance of reaching beyond their comfort zones to help someone else's needs. Yet, I was so bogged down with financial issues, family issues, job issues, etc. I really didn't get time to truly look at the world around me since I was drowning in my own issues!

At the beginning of 2012, I declared that this year would be different. I rung in the new year creating a vision board to really focus on what I wanted to accomplish in my life, not just this year. One thing I really wanted to do was to become more physically active. Thanks to my sister I registered a few years ago for my first 10K and had done a few other events since then. This year I wanted to focus on a healthier lifestyle and better physical fitness. I also wanted to "savor other people's happiness". I want to reach beyond my comfort zone and bring awareness to issues that stir me to tears. Not the silent kind of tears, but the tears that come from a place so deep that your body quakes with each drop. The kind of issue that clings to you and when a new occurence surfaces, past heard of transgressions come vividly to mind. I didn't realize for me, seeds had been planted in 2009.

Ultimate Road Trip Adventure Pictures

The farthest I've driven from my city is probably five hours visiting family in North Carolina. So I was excited to take this road trip to the Midwest. Riding in a car for over ten hours, gives you lots of time to snooze, talk and even more time to think. I spent most of my awake time staring out the window at the landscape. I'm a coastal "lowcountry" girl, the only "mountains" I have to worry about are the ones they call speed bumps outside a local Piggly Wiggly!

Passing through Tennesee

Celebrate the Milestones

Yesterday my mother and I went out to dinner with one of my aunts to celebrate the completion of her process to obtain her doctorate degree. After years of hard work and  overcoming distractions, her ultimate goal is a reality. The only thing left to do is step across that stage and receive her degree. We promised that we would treat her to dinner when this time arrived. Well the time is now and the place was here...

If you are a true BBQ connoisseur or just love good southern home cooking, this is definitely the place to be. This is where our celebration was scheduled to happen and my reflection kicked into high gear. Must have been something in the bbq sauce!